Hey y'all! It's been a hot minute since I've last written a post. My life has been filled with many ups and downs, challenges and triumphs over the past few weeks and I need to talk about it. I'll start out by saying that the picture I've chosen to go along with this blog post is very fitting; foggy, moody, and a tad blurry. My life sometimes seems to fit that description. Life occasionally feels foggy and blurry, like I'm unable to see or predict whats in front of me or what will happen next. Which then makes me incredibly moody. Can you relate?
The many challenges and missteps of life can feel overwhelming and overbearing at times. And for me, these things really heighten my grief and the emotions of missing my mom. Because my mother was my go to person when things went wrong. I'd cry my eyes out in front of her, scream in frustration, and be completely unafraid to be a broken down mess with her. Literally on the floor sometimes, just crying and asking "why?". She always had a response and she always knew what to say. Holding me and comforting me until I came back to a calm state of mind. Maybe the problem wasn't fixed or resolved, but she was able to hold me in my brokenness and help bring peace over me. I miss that. I need that sometimes. To have her calm me down in the midst of a storm.
But as you are all aware of, she's not here to do that. I've had to learn to support, comfort, and calm myself down. And in learning how to do those things, I have nights like last night... when I literally cannot rest. Instead I panic. But even in my panicked state, I know that it is temporary. These emotions of pain and suffering are temporary. How do I know that? How am I able to remind myself of that truth? It's simple. God promises I will find support, comfort, and peace within Him.
With all those "negatives" out and about, I've been able to remind myself of the positives. Like the fact that my mother was a strong and independent women, and regardless of what trials came her way she was able to rely on her faith to get her through anything. Her faith was steadfast and unshaken. All the way up to the day she passed, there was never a moment where I saw a weakness of faith. Which has inspired me to have a faith like hers. To look to God and ask for help and guidance in the midst of the fog, blurriness, and mixed emotions. Because He is strong enough to handle anything I bring him.
Our heavenly father loves me and all that I have to offer. And that includes my brokenness, my very worst days, and my questions "why?". He's here for it all. ALL OF IT. Not in parts, not in fractions.
My relationship with God, It is highly cherished by Him. And He will do anything to love on me, his daughter, to bring comfort, support, and peace.
Even in your most broken down and stress filled moments, the pain and confusion is temporary.
God is the provider of comfort and peace in your life.
Be steadfast in your faith, and the trials you face will become easier to conquer.
"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."